“God doesn’t allow us more than what we are able to endure.” Admittedly, there are times when I question this cliche. Struggling with anxiety is challenging enough, and when I think I have it licked, life happens. In helping to make sense out of such a day as today, I need to commence today’s writing in a different moment in time other than right now.
Honestly, my anxiety is nowhere near where it was even a month ago, even as recently as last night I mentioned to a co-worker that I am feeling the best I have felt since before my kidney issues began. Even now I am feeling good. Feeling good, now, yes, but it has not been an easy road; sometimes it seems like it is not possible for me to go a day without some sort of drama in my life. Despite this, I am holding my own and doing alright.
Fast forwarding to this morning, my phone rang and it was my dear mother inquiring as to why I have not checked my messages? Mom proceeded to tell me that dad, the greatest person I have ever known, is in the hospital with age-related mobility issues. Instead of simply relaying this information to me, information that is upsetting enough, mom accused me of never being there when I am needed. I seldom use social media to discuss deep issues such as this, but I have reached my limit and I need to breathe.
Prior to this call, I was working on radio station related tasks. Instead of the station being a hobby and fun, my standards & expectations were increasing. Then the call regarding dad came in, and with the call, reality hit me like a bucket of ice. Life will change for good or bad in a moment, and at the end of the day, people are really what matter. You know what; if something that I do on the Kaleidoscope Radio Network brings a smile to the face of one person, all of the time and energy that I put into the station is totally worth every second.
The lesson that I am taking away from today is that it doesn’t matter if one or one thousand people tune into Kaleidoscope, what does matter is that the radio station continues to be fun for me. It is only when I am having fun, that people will hear me having fun on the radio, and they may want to tune in or not.
Leave the drama behind as life presents us with enough drama. A strong faith, encouraging family, and friends, along with a great sense of humor are what it takes to get through life’s Journey.
Tears streaming down my face, I thought of this Amy Grant tune. (socan licenced)